On the brink

Lots of fun stuff has happened since last I showed my face 'round these parts. The biggest news is that Three Girls and a Baby is finished. Like, done. For real. I can hardly believe it. It's been critiqued, beta'd, revised, edited and proofread several times over and I'm now at the point where I'm happy with it.

Mostly.

To be honest, a huge part of me is terrified that I've missed something, that I've made a mistake somewhere, that there's something I could have done to make it better. But I'm sure I would have felt like that no matter what. I think, for me, fear is the nature of the beast. So now the book is ready to be released out into the world--where it will be the subject of much acclaim and success, I can only assume.

In addition to a finished manuscript, I also have a lovely book cover. I hired Tamra Westberry, a wonderful graphic artist, to design for me, and I'm very happy with the results. I think the cover is cute, eye-catching, and screams chick-lit.

So the next step is formatting. Basically, when you publish to these various channels (print on demand paperbacks, kindle, nook, ipad, etc.), there are very specific formatting guidelines you have to follow. I decided to start with my paperback because it will take some time to get the proof (sample book that I need to approve) back. I figure while I'm waiting I can work on formatting for kindle and nook. If the proof copy of the paperback looks okay, I will approve it and...the book will be on sale the first week of July. That is such an exciting prospect I almost can't stand it!

In fact, the excitement is making concentration very difficult. I should be getting an approval from the printer in the next few days, letting me know the proof is ready to be shipped and I cannot.stop.checking.my.email. It's horrible. I need to be put out of my misery.

The best way to stop thinking about one novel is to focus your attention on another. I need to get my energy flowing in a productive way, and stop with all this waiting around. I need to start writing again.

So tomorrow I am heading up to the cabin, where there is no internet to distract me (or TV, for that matter). I plan to stay there for about two weeks. And during that time, I am going to finish the draft of the sequel, Three Girls and a Wedding. Finishing the draft will require me to write about 55,000 words. That's a lot. Like, really a lot. It's a crazy, huge, overwhelming, crazysauce kind of goal. But you can't be a writing rock star without kicking some ass. And that's what I plan to do these next two weeks.

And hopefully when I get home I will have a first draft in my hands...and a shiny proof paperback, all ready to be approved.

on a roll

So, I'm for-real revising. I've moved things. I've added things. I've even deleted bits.

It feels good, but weird. The first couple chapters have been written for so long, so changing anything in them is strange. I think it'll be easier revising the newer stuff, just because I'm not as used to it.

I'm just excited to make things better. I really, really like this draft, but I know that there are some bits missing. (And not just the scenes I skipped over toward the end.) There are some things to change, some things to clarify.

I can't say that revision is the most difficult part of the process, but it's definitely a challenge. I shift between being convinced that what I've written is right and doesn't need any improvement and thinking that I'll never be done fixing it. And then, of course, there are the thoughts of impossibilities: How do I differentiate my characters' voices so that they don't all sound like the same person? How do I keep readers interested throughout the whole story? Throughout the whole series?

It'll be worth it, though. That's what I keep telling myself. Everything I do is making my book better. I hope.

I really don't want to put out something mediocre just because I'm so excited to get something out there. As much as I want to get started with ebooks, I want what I put out there to be great.

Truth? I'm totally jealous of Rachel, because she's farther along on the journey than I am. (Though she is busy watching Fringe of late, so maybe that'll give me some time to catch up.)

So, in order for me to get things done, I've got to stop watching Stargate SG-1 (Walter Bishop's in this episode!) and continue the revising process. Chapter two! I saw two bunnies today, which is an auspiscious sign.

back at the office (or rather, in)

Since I've been back to work, I've not really gotten much written. Last weekend, I hit 35,000 words. As of this moment, I'm only at 37,759. That's less than 3000 words over the course of, like, seven days. And 1000 of those words were written in one day.

It's sad, friends.

But I've put the laptop back in the office, which is a start. (That damned TV is just too enticing for me.) I've got a pint of Atwater Block Brewery's Vanilla Java Porter, which is part two in my writing plan for tonight. This week is Rachel's week off and her goal is to be done with her draft by next weekend (our two woman writers' conference). I would also love to have that be the case, but...

Well, let's face it: I'm bad a time management. It's always been my downfall. I barely remember what happened to my time this week. It seemed like the perfect week to writewritewrite because I didn't have many assignments to grade. Alas, other life-related things were happening and, well, less than 3000 words.

But Rachel is at 40,000 words at the moment (the most she's ever written. She is AMAZING). So, I hope to hit that tonight. A little competition's good for the soul, right?

My mind's already on edits I'll make once this draft is done. One friend who's been looking over Awaking thus far has given me some EXCELLENT suggestions (not specific, like, "do this here," but general stuff) that I will definitely incorporate to make this book even more rocking. It may or may not cut down on word count, but really, I'm not concerned about that. My aim is between 50,000-70,000 words when the book is all said and done.

Sigh.

As sad that I am at my abysmal progress for the week, I am happy at where the story is. So happy, in fact, that I'm about to get back to it. It's almost party time. (Really.)

Until next time, peace out.

the ending of an era

I'm slowly coming to terms with the fact that it's Friday.

I know, I know. For most people, Friday is cause for celebration. But for me, this week, Friday only means that Monday will bring the "real world" and its responsibilities. I won't be able to just sit and write and write and write. I'll be lesson planning. And grading.

(In fact, as much as I had intended to not let this happen, I've got things to grade right now. I've avoided them all week in favor of writing. But now it's time to pay the piper.)

The bright side is there, however: Monday starts the fourth quarter of the year, which means the end is in sight. If I can make it to June 6th, then I have until late August to write all I want.

This break has been really good for me and for Awaking. It's been quite some time since I've actually finished a draft that I've started (perhaps even since the first draft of this particular book -- which was a long time ago). That I'm 35,000 words into this draft right now is a triumph.

I only wish I could write faster. Maybe that'll be my goal for book two of the trilogy. Or, let's face it, the rest of book one.

I think I'm going to focus all my energy on finishing this trilogy before I work on anything else. Maybe this seems like the obvious choice, but I've really been struggling with this. I've got the promising beginnings of a sports-related story (another rewrite) and I'm really excited to finish that one off. But I'm thinking that trilogy first is going to be the wisest choice. But what to work on after that is the question that begs to be answered now. I was talking with my husband about this last night: I don't know if I'm genre-specific--and I don't know whether that's a good thing or a bad thing. I've got a few supernatural-type stories kicking around, but I've got just as many (more?) realistic fiction ideas. I'm not sure whether this will work for me or against me in the long run.

Speaking of decisions, I'm currently trying to decide something about the actual release of Awaking. I'm wondering if it wouldn't be prudent to wait until book two is also complete and release them back-to-back. I'm still considering the wisdom (or folly) behind this idea. Any insights?

Okay. It's after nine o'clock and I haven't written nearly as much as I should have today. And today, sadly, is probably the last day I'll have for a while to really sit and just write. Tomorrow I move my sister in to live with me, and Sunday I'm playing at church...and, let's face it, getting ready for the work week.

looking forward

I'm a teacher (I don't know if I've mentioned that directly--and I'm still not sure I should), and the only thing that's sustaining me this week is the promise of Spring Break next week. Is it because I'll be in some tropical paradise, sipping mojitos and gazing at the majestic ocean as it gently laps at the shore? Nope. I'll still be in cold old Michigan and I have no plans to leave my house. At all.

I'm excited because I plan to devote all that time "off" to writing.

(Note that off is in quotation marks. A teacher is never really off. I am trying to orchestrate things so that I won't have anything to grade past maybe Friday [and as Friday is the end of the marking period, I think I can swing it], but I still have to plan for the coming weeks. Oh, and I'm taking a class for my Master's degree, and I'll have to do work for that over my break.)

I'm jealous when I read about other authors spending hours each day writing. I'd love to do that, but, as I mentioned in my last post, the real world keeps me from it. I suppose I could get up at four o'clock in the morning and spend an hour an a half or two hours writing, but I doubt it would be coherent at that point in the day. Now, I'll be the first to admit that my time management skills leave something to be desired. I know I've spent too many hours watching Stargate SG-1 instead of doing something even resembling productive. (It's just that Daniel Jackson is so pretty...) I would much rather read a good book than grade a test or an essay. And I'd rather check Facebook than do a class assignment.

But that has to change. I know it. And I'm hoping that next week will kick-start everything for me.

I've been meeting my goal of at-least-one-sentence-per-day since I set it last week, but, unfortunately, I'm not getting much more than that. Time, again, is not on my side.

But with next week off and Easter Weekend's writers' conference (at Rachel's place), I think April will be an excellent month for my writing endeavors.

As always, I'll keep you posted.

to be the rainmaker

I had hoped to update the blog earlier this week, but things have been a little out of hand. Since I took some time off from work last week, I ended up with a double-whammy of work to do this week: the assignments I neglected on my days off plus the work assigned while I was out. Couple that with a late night at work and no blogging is apparently the result.

I, like Rob Thomas, wish the real world would stop hassling me.

On a bright note, however, I have kept to my goal of writing at least one sentence every day. It seems like an insignificant goal, maybe, but I'm finding that having the consistent forward motion (even if it's just a little bit) is satisfying and even inspiring.

(I kind of feel like I should mention the whole Amanda-Hocking-signs-a-two-million-dollar-contract-with-a-traditional-publisher thing, but I have too many thoughts about it and don't want to subject you, dear reader, to the twists and turns in my mind. Let's just say I'll be watching with interest to see what happens next.)

I picked up a magazine on Sunday about writing a novel in 30 days. Now, I've read a book that promises the same outcome, but this magazine suggests a much more...organized approach to the writing process. A few of the tips have helped me to clarify and focus a bit, so we'll see how that goes. I don't know that I'm necessarily aiming for a book in 30 days or less, but it'd be nice. And I have spring break coming up the first week of April. I plan on devoting much of that time to writing. And then at the end of April, Rachel and I will hold a writers' conference over Easter weekend. I'm really looking forward to spending the time writing, reading each other's work, giving feedback, wearing sloth pants, and eating lots of mac and cheese. It should be epic.

As always, I wish I had a robot-me who could take over my daily responsibilities (or maybe just some of them) so that I had more time to do what I want to do (in this case, write). Alas, I have no robot. As with so many things in life, if I want to make this happen, I've got to find a way to make it happen. I've waited too long for the mystical genie to appear and offer me three wishes. It's time to take matters into my own hands and get stuff done.

I don't want to wonder anymore if I can "make it" as a writer. I don't want to wait any longer to "be" a writer. I am. It's in me. And in order to "make it," I've got to first make time for it.

And so, dear friends, I leave you. Time to write.

setting up for success

So, I'm home from Phase Two of Birthday Weekend Extravaganza. (Phase One was actually going OUT for St. Patty's day for the first time and hanging out with Rachel and other friends. Phase Two was Niagara and wineries. Phase three: dinosaurs.) I managed to get some reading done over the last 48 hours or so: While in the car on the way to Niagara, I read aloud long selections from The 4 Hour Body by Tim Ferriss to Brian (so he would not feel left out), and I also managed to finish Switched by Amanda Hocking.

Interestingly, both of these books solidified in me my resolve to get writing.

I meant to make a post to this effect on Thursday, but I wasn't at home long enough to do so, so here goes:

I'm making a commitment to myself. By the time I turn thirty (364 days from today; 2012 is a leap year), I will have completed (drafted and revised) three novels. (As for which three books, that's still a little up in the air. I really want to work on book one of my trilogy--working title is Awaking. But then I'm already 22,000+ words along in my yet-unnamed soccer story. And I'd really love to redo The Crystal Society simply because it's been around for so long--and I think the premise would be pretty well-received. So, right now, I'm thinking those are the three.) Also by March 17, 2012, I will have published these three novels (probably through Smashwords or something similar). And in order to get this done, I commit to writing at least one sentence every day.

Okay, I know what you're thinking: One sentence? You'll never get anything done that way.

Look, I didn't say I'd write only one sentence, just at least one, every day, no matter what. That's a goal I can live with, and it sets me up for success, unlike a goal of, say, two pages per day.

So, I'll let you know how this goes.

I'd write more, but it's time for me to write my at least one sentence for the day. I think I'll work on...Awaking. I've been thinking about it since Niagara. Wish me luck!

why i have to

When I was really young -- kindergarten, maybe -- I remember walking into my bedroom while my mom called something after me. In my mind, I added, "Mom said."

In the fifth grade, I wrote a story in a notebook. And then another one.

In middle school, all my "story" notebook were the same color (teal, for some reason) so I could discriminate easily between them and my academic notebooks.

(I still have these notebooks, by the way.)

I passed the stories around. I inspired others to write stories, too.

In the ninth grade, I finished my first book. It wasn't my first long story, but it was, for some reason, the most important story I'd yet written. I remember walking the halls of my high school telling strangers that I had just finished my novel (and I probably had a ream of paper in my hand to prove it).

My senior year, I had an independent study wherein my task for the year was to complete a novel.

...and on and on...

There's never a time in my memory when I haven't thought of stories, told stories, written stories. And nothing brings me more joy than weaving a world from words, than crying while I write an emotional moment, than hearing from someone else that they're enjoying reading something I've written.

I think we've all got a purpose in life. Well, probably, we all have a great many purposes, but I'm talking about Purpose. And mine has always been writing.

And finally the planets are aligning.

revision woes

Rewriting always makes me a little sad.

Now, understand when I say "rewriting," I don't mean "rewriting small sections of text," I mean "rewriting entire drafts." Why, you may ask? Well, I guess the easy answer is twofold: I am both stubborn and lazy. I'll start writing a draft and I'll be convinced it's working. I'll have plans, and the draft will, more or less, follow those plans. And I'll get to the end of the draft and I'll feel very accomplished for having finished something. And then I'll start rereading. And then the pain begins.

I'll think, Really, I thought this was a good idea?

And I'll finally see all the shortcomings my idea had to begin with. Now, I'm not saying that my idea was completely worthless or anything--far from it. Instead, I'll see that I didn't execute the idea to the best of my ability.

Thus the rewrite.

Take, for example, a story I started back in high school. (High school! I've now been teaching high school longer than I ever attended it.) This particular story, which never did have a name, ended up being 87,000+ words long (and I never did "end" the thing). I realize now that, while the basic premise was good, the execution was lacking. It sounds like a high school kid wrote it because, well, one did. So, within the last year or two, I decided to completely overhaul this book. I've kept the same characters and many of the same plot points, but I've changed a great many things, too. I'm now in the rewriting phase.  As of today, I'm at 22,400 words. It's a little sad; the book now is only a quarter as long as the original draft had been. And it's not even like I can cannibalize parts of the original draft: This is, in essence, a completely new book.

Now, if this were an isolated incident, it might not be so depressing. Alas. I have two more "first drafts" that are suffering through the same fate.

I know that the books will be better for the extra work, but it's disheartening. I'd like to think that I could write a really good first draft--one that, sure, would need a few edits, but that would be pretty much what I wanted it to be.

I guess I'm not being entirely fair to myself. The book I referenced above and one of the others are works I wrote in high school. And while, yes, I'd like to think that I had some talent as a high schooler, I'm also woman enough to admit that I wouldn't really like for anyone else to read these works.

So, I suppose what I really need now is the followthrough required to rewrite. Because, let's face it, in the long run, it'll be worth it.

grabbing life

Well, today is the day, I suppose. It could be said about any day, really, but today really is the day.

Encouraged by the success authors like Amanda Hocking have had with epublishing, my friend and birthday twin Rachel and I have decided to grab life by the cajones and do what we have always wanted to do: write books and make them available for others to read.

So, here we are, less than a week before we both hit the big 2-9, trying to make our lives what we want them to be.

I'm working on a couple projects at the moment, waiting to see which one wins out for the time being. I'll update you with more details later.

So, why am I keeping this blog? Part to be kept accountable. Part to let my voice be heard. Part just to write. Because a girl's got to, let's face it.